When the Rut is Between your Ears

I've been told numerous times in my life that I live in my own little world. In translation: I'm often oblivious to what's actually going on around me.

In elementary school I was called a daydreamer, and I'll be honest I've always considered it a compliment.

Maybe it's an escape.

Maybe, as It's been pointed out to me on several occasions, it's a trauma response. I've often speculated that the world inside my head is just better than the world around me. After all, there are dragons there and not just because I read a lot of fantasy. I'll be honest I don't read as much as I'd like to because even escaping into a book is harder that just thinking about some far-fetched scenario that will never occur.

I'm not saying you should never daydream. A vivid imagination can be a crucial asset, especially if you like to write, though fiction is not my wheelhouse. But I've been asking myself lately am I so busy imagining life that I'm forgetting to actually LIVE it???

Imagination can allow us to experience the gamut of human experience and more. From playing out practical conversations in your head to fantasizing you have an epic movie worthy romance, all the way to riding on the back of dragon. But should it replace actually experiencing living those experiences? Sure, you can't ride on the back of a dragon, but you can experience so many of the things that people spend their time thinking about.

There is comfort in the world inside your head. You control it. How often do you fantasize about rejection, or heartbreak? Be honest, how much more likely is it you think about the perfect zinger to the fight you were having that leaves you with the last word and winner of the argument you were having with an adversary? Come on over thinkers where are you?

But I'm starting to realize you miss what's around you when you live so much in your head. You miss the little things that might make you smile or even shed a real tear. There is a danger that you start comparing the world in your head to the world around you, and what happens when the world around you falls short, or you just stop engaging in life around you?

I've decided it's time to come back to the present. So how do I do that?

It's a pretty common technique called mindfulness. To summarize its the practice of being present in the moment without judgement. It isn't about eliminating thoughts, but recognizing them, acknowledging them, without living in them.

Sit in a room and actively listen to the noises around you, pay attention to the little conversations going around you. For me right now, I'm hearing the steamer at Starbucks, the crinkle of paper, and the staff just talking. I see the holiday menu and realize that before I know it, Christmas will be here, and this year I'm not grinchily holding off the festive cheer. Don't get me wrong I'm not decorating, but I'm not hating on anyone who already has.

But even now It's so hard to focus, mindfulness is not a skill I have mastered by any means.

To tie in some faith, I have to remind you that this is the day that the Lord has made. (if you sang that you were surely a VBS kid.) God's given us today as a present, and we are called to live in it.

Thinking about the future can be good, but when it bogs down your heart with worry or stress, we are called to let it go

Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

It can be said that there are even spiritual significance in the little things, enjoying the taste of coffee, or a hug from someone special.

I asked Theo, my AI sidekick, to give me some tips on how to transition from daydreaming to living and here are the most helpful tips I found

1. Recognize the escape: Realize when you are escaping from reality and determine what triggered it.

2. Identify the longing: Your thoughts are likely rooted in some subconscious desire. See if you can pinpoint it.
   

3. Engage in your sense: use your physical to reconnect you to reality. What do you see, hear, smell, feel?
   

4. Cultivate REAL experiences: put yourself out there. Leave the couch, and turn those fantasies into lived experiences.
   

5. Practice intentional precense: give the people and things around you your undivided attention, when you have a "loose thought" recognize it, acknowledge it, maybe store it in your memory to revisit later. But don't let it take away from the life you're trying to create for yourself in real life.